Common Questions

Can You Tell Me More About MarriageRomance.com?
What Is The Biblical Basis For MarriageRomance.com
Is There Scientific Proof MarriageRomance.com Works?
Does This Site Help Married Couples?

What Are The Intimate Writing Categories?
Are Submitted Writings, Screened For Content?
Please Explain Comments And Discussion Group Etiquette?
How Do I Print A Writing?

Is Oral Sex Sinful?
How Do We Keep Our Sex Life Pure?



Question: Can you tell me more about MarriageRomance.com?

Answer:  MarriageRomance.com is a place where married couples anonymously write and read marriage romance love stories and poems and other writings. We have nine categories of writings that range from prayer requests to marriage love stories.

All writings submitted to the website are positive about marriage, and have moral content, and they do not contain profanity or demeaning sexual slang words.

Question:   Are submitted writings, screened for content, before publishing?

Answer:  Yes each writing submitted is screened to assure it does not conflict with Biblical teachings. 

Writings that do not contain sexual activity more than kissing and holding hands are rated heartwarming and have a pink heart marriage,marriage ,marriage, marriage,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage love,marriage love,marriage love, marriage love, romance,romance,romance,romance,romance marriage, romance marriage, romance marriage, married,married,married,married,marriages,marriages,marriages,marriages,romance stories, romance stories, romance stories,romance stories,love stories,love stories,love stores,love storiesbeside them.

Writings about a couple dating (before marriage), should limit sexual activity to kissing and holding hands, so they are moral.  Singles may write stories containing fantasies  about what it will be like when they get married.

Writings about a married couple that contain intimate sexual activity are considered "intimate" writings and are rated romantic, passionate, exotic or risqué

We ask that intimate writings be submitted anonymously to help prevent embarrassment, jealously and lust.    Click here to read more about intimate writings.

Writings should be positive about marriage, they should not contain profanity, they should not be contrary to Biblical teachings, and they should only contain moral sexual activity.

We define moral sex, as sex that is condoned in the Bible - sex between a husband and wife.

To help define moral sexual activity, we look to Christian marriage authors such as Tim LaHaye, Dr. Ed Wheat, Dr Clifford and Joyce Penner, Linda Dillow, Lorraine Pintus, Tommy Nelson, and others.

Based on the Bible and Christian authors on marriage we feel moral "sexual activity" falls within the following guidelines. 

We know everyone will not agree with all the rules but we hope our love for each other through Christ will  help us overlook our differences.  With that introduction, here are the guidelines for writing stories with sexual content.

  • It is very important that the stories say whether they are true or fiction.  Please be honest and mention at the beginning or end of your story whether it is true or made up.
     

  • We recommend that stories be written by the husband and wife together, as a fun activity together. 

    If this is not possible then we suggest that the spouse who writes the story, read the story to their spouse and make sure their spouse approves of any sexual activity in the story, before they submit the writing.  This will help solo writers to not submit risqué circumstances from their imagination that their spouse would not approve of.

    We recommend that married couples save their sexual energy for when they are together.  And so we don't want this web site to be just another solo outlet for a married person. 

    However if a married person is sure their spouse would approve of the sexual activity in the story then they don't need to get their spouse's approval. 

    Or if they want to surprise their spouse and show the story to their spouse after it is published that is fine too. 

    Or if they want to surprise their spouse and get their spouse to try and pick their writing out from other writings on the site after it is published, that is fine too.   
     

  • Generally, except as mentioned below, only sex between a husband and wife is permitted in stories.
     

  • Please try to use words that are not offensive to married couples.  A list of blocked and substituted words may be found on the "Submit A Writing" page.
     

  • Stories should not contain sex in public.  By this we mean sex where the public can see the couple or where there is fair chance that someone might come along and see them.  If the couple is on a secluded beach or in their private back yard or some place where there is only a remote chance that someone might come along and if someone did come along they could cover up,  then it is ok. 
     

  • Stories should not contain sexual activity alone such as masturbation unless their spouse has asked or encouraged he or she to do it.
     

  • Here are the spanking rules.  The Bible does not teach that the husband and wife should punish each other.  The marriage relationship is one of love not of parent/child. So, husbands and wives may not spank each other for disciplinary reasons.  In a story the husband or wife may ask their spouse to spank them because they say it turns them on to be spanked.  In that case the spouse may spank them.   Parents may spank their own children.  It should not turn the parent on to spank their child.  If this is happening this is child abuse.  Parents should not spank anyone else's child.  The proper way to discipline someone else's child is to tell their parents what they did wrong. 
     

  • There is another idea about sex that we need to understand. Why is it wrong when men expose themselves in public? Why it is wrong to be a Peeping Tom? The reason is, it is wrong to derive sexual pleasure from anyone without his or her permission. This is an extension of loving your neighbor. If you love your neighbor you will not derive sexual pleasure from them, without their permission.

    This is the reason our rules for stories require that couples not be seen or heard in public when they are being intimate.

    The flip-side of this is that in our society it has been accepted that it is ok to derive sexual excitement from other people, as long as they have given their permission.

    For example married couples who submit stories should understand that other married couples may  read the stories and become sexually excited when reading them – and this actually will be helping the married couples, because God wants married couples to enjoy sex.

    The writer of Song Of Solomon and God surely were aware that this book would over the ages be read by married couples and would be used to increase passion in marriages.

    Another observation which factors into this idea of deriving sexual pleasure from someone who is not your spouse is this.  Some married persons, especially men, sometimes get turned on when their spouse becomes sexually aroused by someone else.

    The erotic stories on this site are an example of this.  For example as a rule, men do not get as aroused when reading the stories as women do.  But men do get turned on when their wife reads a story that turns her on. 

    Approval and agreement and permission within the marriage is the key to whether sexual activity is right or wrong.  The apostle Paul teaches that our bodies are not only our own, but they also belong to our spouse.  And so when we do anything sexual, it is best if we are with our spouse, but if we are not with our spouse the activity needs to be with our spouses permission and for the benefit of our marriage.  By solo we mean when a spouse is alone. 

  • The couple in a story should not be involved in immoral activity such as watching a movie or video that promotes or condones sex before marriage or sex outside of Biblical boundaries.  Stories can be about watching or reading moral erotic stories and videos.  Sinclair Institute sex education and better sex videos, while not certified as moral, are the closest thing to moral erotic videos on the market today, and so they can be mentioned in stories.
     

  • Oral sex is permitted  in stories as we believe God allows a married couple to caress each other and stimulate each other with different ways, as a way to add spice and variety to the marriage. 

    We believe it is perfectly natural for a husband and wife to desire to explore each others bodies.  We believe that normally married couples enjoy sex the most when the penis penetrates the vagina, but it is not sinful for a husband and wife to use their fingers or a vibrator or  their tongue to help stimulate each other.  Click here for more on oral sex. 

    Medical Alert: However we warn couples that there is more and more evidence from medical studies that directly links both male and female oral sex to neck and face cancers.  More specifically, many medical studies have recently proven a link between oral sex and an increased incidence of squamous cell carcinoma of the tonsils and throat which metastasizes to the neck lymph nodes.  So we encourage married couples to prayerfully consider what is "profitable" for the long term of their marriage before they engage in regular oral sex.

    Medical Alert:  If you and your spouse do occasionally kiss each other in the genital area, please realize that you should not kiss the genital area if you have a "fever blister" ,  "cold sore" or "night fever blister".  Because these mouth sores which are Herpes Simplex Virus 1 are very contagious and if one of them comes in contact with the genital area of the spouse while it is blistering and even up to 10 days after the blister has healed, the blister can cause a Herpes Simplex Virus 2 infection in the genital area of the spouse  Click here for more information in this medical alert.
     

  • We feel anal sex is not healthy and so it should not be in stories.    The following passage from "The Act of Marriage After 40" explains our position.

    "While we're on the subject, there is one sexual act that we do not favor; anal intercourse.  We don't believe God made our bodies for that practice, and the anus doesn't serve a sexual purpose for the body.  That act (known as sodomy) is highly dangerous for both partners.  Once inside the anus, the penis can become contaminated with disease-producing organisms, thus causing danger to the man's reproductive and urinary structures.  "

    "Anal intercourse should be avoided for physical reasons," writes Dr. Clifford and Joyce Penner.

    It's just not wise!  If the man enters the woman's anus and then her vagina, he then contaminates her reproductive tracts and sometimes her urinary tract since it is so close to her vagina. 

    When the man's penis enters the woman's anus, the stretching often causes the blood vessels in her rectum to burst, which makes both her and her husband vulnerable to infection.

    Obviously God did not design the anus for sexual intercourse."

    End of quote

  • Sexual aids are ok as long as they could not possibly harm the body or symbolize harm or belittlement to the spouse.
     

  • In the past we have had several stories submitted where the husband or wife tied each other up with a ribbon or silk.  In the past we have cut those parts out of the stories. 

    But in the spirit of not being legalistic, we are now going to allow stories where the husband or wife tie their spouse with something that is not strong such as ribbon or silk, as long as it is clear the spouse wanted to be tied up, and it is clear the spouse would free the tied spouse as soon as requested, or it is clear the tied up spouse could free himself or herself if they wanted to. 
     

  • What about fantasies?  Many times a husband and wife will make up and tell each other a fantasy story while making love in order to help each other get turned on.  Is that sinful?  No, fantasies are not sinful as long as they are moral by Biblical standards.

    • What is the Biblical basis for allowing fantasies on this web site? 

      • First fantasies do help the married couples who read them get sexually aroused for their spouse. 

      • Second the Bible is very permissive in the area of sex within marriage when a husband and wife are in agreement about the sexual activity. 

        • Can we all agree that marriage is defined as the union of one man with one woman.  Any sex outside of this union is defined as "sex outside of marriage".

        • As you may know God condoned King David having hundreds of wives.  Each wife after the first wife, is considered "sex outside of marriage". 

        • As you may know Sarah gave her husband Abraham permission to have sex with her maid Hagar.  And Abraham gave his wife Sarah permission to have sex with the Kings of Egypt. 

        • God allowed "sex outside of marriage" in the Bible as long as it was not stealing someone else's spouse and as long as it was not sex with a virgin. 

        • So even though we oppose sex outside of marriage in real life, we do allow it in fantasy stories as long as the husband and wife give each other permission to fantasize. 

    • So can a husband tell his wife a fantasy story about her having sexual interaction with another man?  Yes, if in the fantasy the man is single or has the permission from his wife, the husband may make up a fantasy about his wife in order to help increase passion in the marriage bed.

    • Can a wife make up a fantasy about her having sex with another man?  Yes, if in the fantasy her husband gives her permission to make up the story and as long as the other man in the fantasy is single or in the fantasy has permission from his wife.

    • Is it wrong to fantasize about homosexual relations?  Yes it is wrong to fantasize about anything that is immoral.  The only reason it is not wrong to fantasize about sex outside of marriage, is when in the fantasy your spouse gives you permission to have the sex and if the other person is married, their spouse also gives permission for the sexual interaction.  But God is the one who says homosexual conduct is sinful so there is no way to get permission to do that.

  • We encourage stories that develop the romance and excitement and emotional love that the couple have for each other, and only mildly describe the passionate sexual side.
     

  • Writings may mention nationality and race, however  try not to compare races or nationalities or paint attributes of one race or nationality as superior.  
     

  • Writings may describe physical attributes of yourself and your spouse and describe sensations and experiences together.
     

Even with all these rules there will be some writings that contain conduct between the husband and wife that some married couples would not do.  While the conduct in the story may not be immoral, it may seem that the couple is putting too much emphasis on sex.  But we allow these writings because we recognize that God has given a married couple freedom in this area and different couples are at different levels of maturity.  And so a couple may write a story this year, and 10 years later would look back and say; "Wow we sure were oversexed back then!". 

So if you find writings that seem risqué we encourage you to help balance the web site by submitting a story of your own experiences with sexual tones you feel are more appropriate for the web site.  And we encourage Christians to share their testimony of how God has worked in their marriage. 

And if you do read a story that seems immoral please let us know and we will change it or delete it.

Submissions should be between one to three pages in length. 

If the submission does not meet our standards, we may change the story or not publish it.  We may change a story to take immorality out, or fix grammar problems, misspellings, or other reasons.

If you submit a writing, and for some reason we do not publish the writing, we may post a message for you, on the screen that displays when you first login.  The message will explain why we did not publish your submission.  Only you will be able to see the message.

Once approved; writings appear under one of the "Read A ..."  categories on the left side of the web site.

Question: What are the "sex stories" writing categories?

Answer:  When someone submits a writing to MarriageRomance.com, we screen the writing to assure the content is moral.  If a writing contains references to sex between the husband and wife in the story, we call it a "sex story", and we rate it a romance sex story, passionate sex story, hot sex story, steamy sex story, or erotic sex story.  Following is a description of each of the "sex stories" categories.

In all writings in all categories no cursing, negative, or demeaning language is permitted. 

We ask that intimate writings be submitted anonymously to help prevent embarrassment, jealously and coveting. 

Romance sex stories have a pink and red marriage,marriage ,marriage, marriage,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage love,marriage love,marriage love, marriage love, romance,romance,romance,romance,romance marriage, romance marriage, romance marriage, married,married,married,married,marriages,marriages,marriages,marriages,romance stories, romance stories, romance stories,romance stories,love stories,love stories,love stores,love stories heart beside them and have brief references to intimacy between the husband and wife in the writing.  These writings  focus on the emotional and romance side of marriage and only briefly describe the physical aspect of marriage. 

Passionate sex stories have a red heart  marriage,marriage ,marriage, marriage,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage love,marriage love,marriage love, marriage love, romance,romance,romance,romance,romance marriage, romance marriage, romance marriage, married,married,married,married,marriages,marriages,marriages,marriages,romance stories, romance stories, romance stories,romance stories,love stories,love stories,love stores,love stories beside them and are marriage love stories with detailed intimate descriptions of marriage sex.   This category includes writings where the husband and wife may explore each other with kisses and tongues during foreplay.  These writings may include references to kissing and limited oral contact during foreplay. 

Hot sex stories have a deep red or maroon heart  marriage,marriage ,marriage, marriage,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage romance,marriage love,marriage love,marriage love, marriage love, romance,romance,romance,romance,romance marriage, romance marriage, romance marriage, married,married,married,married,marriages,marriages,marriages,marriages,romance stories, romance stories, romance stories,romance stories,love stories,love stories,love stores,love stories beside them and are stories that go beyond normal foreplay, kissing and sex with conduct such as oral sex, sex toys, and tying each other up with ribbons.. 

Steamy sex stories have a purple heart  Risque Stories Of Marriage - Intimate Content beside them.  Writings with sexual activity in the car or outdoors automatically fall into this category.  These writings may appear to be borderline risqué or risky.  While we allow these stories because we give the author the benefit of the doubt, please understand this website strongly discourages public sexual activity, illegal sexual activity and unsafe sexual activity.  

Erotic sex stories have a blue heart Risque Stories Of Marriage - Intimate Content beside them and are writings that contain at least one word that might sound naughty or offensive to some readers, but as the word or words are used in the story, they are moral.  

Question:  How can I print a writing?

Answer:  When you print a writing it may chop off the right side of the text.  To solve this problem, highlight the story and press "Control C" or choose "Copy" from the edit menu, to copy the story into the clipboard.  Then go to WordPad or some other editor and press "Control V" or "Paste" from the edit menu, to paste the story into the text editor.  Then you can print the story from the text editor. 

Question: Is Oral Sex Sinful?

Answer: Some Christians  feel oral sex is sinful because they know the Bible condemns homosexuality and homosexuals practice oral sex.

We do not promote oral sex and we do not condemn it. 

Some might think that oral sex, which is kissing your spouses genital area, must be wrong because the genitals were created for a different function and kissing them must be a misuse of their intended function.  This "misuse of intended function" argument sounds fine at first until you apply this same logic to other areas of the body. 

When you think about it, the mouth was created to eat and consume food and to breath air.   So since the mouth was created to eat food and breath, then using this same "misuse of intended function" argument,  it would be sin for a husband and wife to kiss each other with the mouth and wrong to kiss each other on the mouth, because the mouth was intended to consume food and breath, not to kiss and be kissed.

And applying this same "misuse of intended function" argument, I suppose it would be wrong for the feet to be rubbed because the feet were intended to "walk" not to be massaged.   Why do we massage feet?  Because it feels good.  And why do some married couples engage in oral sex?  Because it feels good.  So we can see that it is ok to kiss or massage parts of the body if it feels good, even if those parts of the body were not created to be kissed or massaged.

Medical Alert: However there is more and more mounting medical evidence from medical studies that both male and female oral sex causes squamous cell carcinoma in the tonsils and throat which metastasizes to the neck lymph nodes. Therefore we want to warn married couples to prayerfully consider the medical consequences of oral sex. 

Medical Alert:  However if you and your spouse do kiss each other in the genital area, please realize that you run the increased risk of acquiring head and face cancers and you should not do so if you have a "fever blister",  "cold sore" or "night fever blister".  Because these mouth sores which are Herpes Simplex Virus 1 are very contagious and if one of them comes in contact with the genital area of the spouse while it is blistering and even up to 10 days after the blister has healed, the blister can cause a Herpes Simplex Virus 2 infection in the genital area of the spouse  Click here for more information in this medical alert.

Question:  How Do We Keep Our Marriage Sex Life Pure?

Some Christian married couples feel that if they enjoy sex too much or if they focus too much on sex, that they are lusting and are sinning. 

The Biblical definition of "lust" is to "covet" someone sexually who is not your spouse.  The secular definition of "lust" is to have "passion" or "sexual desire".   Please do not get these two definitions mixed up. God wants married couples to enjoy sex.  God wants a husband and wife to have "sexual desire"  for each other. 

The Bible also indicates we can "covet" or "lust" after other things besides sex.  We are not to "covet" our neighbors wife, our neighbors maidservant, manservant, barn or donkey.  Basically God wants us to be content with what we have.

A  husband and wife cannot "covet" or "lust" (by the Biblical definition) after each other.  A husband and wife are not guilty of "coveting" each other, even if they stay in bed all day together for a week.  Love and romance and sexual desire come in seasons.  Take the honeymoon for example.  Married couples spend much time together having sexual desire for each other during this time.  Are they guilty of "coveting" or "lust"?  They are not guilty of coveting or lust.

God devoted an entire book of the Bible with a story of a married couple full of sexual desire for each other.  That book is called Songs Of Solomon. 

A married couples sex life is pure because of their relationship - because they are married.   God encourages a husband and wife to have sexual desire for each other.

Look at the book of Song Of Solomon in the Bible.  The married couple there were full of sexual passion for each other.   Look in Proverbs 5:18b where it says to "rejoice in the wife of your youth. "   And in Hebrews 13:4a the Bible says, "Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled:"    And look at what Paul says in I Corinthians 7:5, “Do not deprive each other, except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, to be free for prayer, but then return to one another, so that Satan may not tempt you through your lack of self-control.”   Paul instructs married couples to have sex regularly.  Do you think God would want married couples to have sex regularly without sexual desire for each other?

Many arguments in marriages begin in the bedroom where one spouse wants to do something that the other spouse feels is sinful because of their upbringing.

When this happens try not to be legalistic.  Jesus condemned legalism as it distorts God's laws and causes Christians to revert to living under the law and usually causes them to break God's laws in other more important areas. 

It is especially important in a marriage for the husband and wife to be compromising  with each other (within God's moral will) to meet each others sexual desires.

We believe it is very important to live a "holy and pure" life to please God.  God has set up laws to help mankind.  A  "holy and pure" life is not keeping a set of legalistic rules.  More than once Jesus said, "I desire mercy not sacrifice."  Jesus taught that we should focus on loving and being merciful, instead of focusing on keeping a set of man made rules. 

When you feel something is sinful, go to the Bible with your spouse and find out what God has to say about the issue.  If God does not condemn what your spouse wants to do, and it is not illegal, unhealthy or dangerous, then maybe your feelings are rooted in legalism instead of in Biblical truth.

God's laws are really not difficult to keep.  It is the man made extensions to God's laws that weight people down.  Jesus said in Matthew 11:28 to 30 ,  "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

If we walk in the Spirit, meaning we are thankful to God for all we have and we are thankful to God for salvation through Jesus Christ and we are thankful for our spouse, then we will want to live our life to please our spouse and please God and we will bestow the "fruits of the spirit", which are mentioned in Galatians 5; 22 and 23 where it says, "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law."

In a married couple's bedroom the focus should not be on whether a person's spouse is wrong, but rather on fulfilling the sexual needs and desires of the spouse.

Legalism robs Christians of God's grace and peace and joy.  Legalism also hinders the spread of the Gospel of the Jesus Christ as non-Christians notice a lack of love when Christians attack them and when Christians argue amongst themselves over issues that are not condemned in the Bible.

How do you keep your marriage sex life pure? Your marriage sex life is pure, because you are married. Hebrews 13:4a says, "Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled:" 

Your sex life is pure because it is honorable and undefiled.  Sex with your spouse is glorifying to God.  God wants you both to enjoy it.  Feel free to fulfill each others desires in bed, for that is honoring to God and pure.  For by doing so you will fulfill your spouse's sexual and emotional needs so they can better serve God.

Question:  Please Explain Comments And Discussion Group Etiquette?

In our discussion groups sometimes we may disagree with something someone said.  And when we read the writings and stories on this site we may disagree with something someone said in a writing. 

How can we gently disagree with a writing or a posting on the discussion group?

First we need to understand the editors of this site attempt to assure that no immoral advice or immoral writings are posted to the site.  If they miss something please contact them by email at:

mail@marriageromance.com.

The web site administrators would like to ask those who leave comments and post in the discussion groups, to refrain from directly referring to the author or characters in a story or author of a post in any negative or judgmental or condemning way.  Instead we ask that those who comment, state their view of what the Bible says and means to them on the given subject.

We also ask that when someone says the Bible teaches something, that they include the actual verse reference, verse text and verse interpretation from the Bible that teaches what they claim.

We also ask that if someone gives advise on this web site that they not correct the advice of a previous poster.   Everyone is welcome to give additional advice but not belittle or discount advice given by someone else in the discussion group or in the comments of a writing.  If you feel ungodly advice was given by someone, again please email our editors with your concern.

John 13 verse 35 says, "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye love one another."   In the spirit of brotherly and sisterly love we have added these rules to assure the web site is a peaceful, harmonious, Godly and loving place, and a good example to other believers and to the world.

 

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