My husband left

Submitted July 31, 2003.
My husband and me got married not even a year ago (last August 10, 2002). A month after the wedding he started to leave and run to his mother's house, who is very lonely and permissive with his son's behavior towards the marriage, she is influencing him to get divorce so she can have him "back in her house and in her life".  Robert will be 31 next September.

Eventually, Robert was coming back home after a few days, and after a month or two, back again in his mom's house, who makes his life very easy and pleasant in the house so he doesnt want to leave (her)

Today is July 31 and my husband left 3 weeks ago, he has decided to get divorce and end this marriage.....and I can not even describe the pain that I feel in my heart every night and every morning when I wake up and his side of the bed is empty...

I am 31 myself and all I wanted in my life was to be with RObert forever and have a child with him....I cant think about the idea of "dating" again and finding a husband and a possible father of my kids.

I just can't conceive my life without him, I miss him with my entire soul and I would do anything for a miracle in my marriage.

Please pray for our marriage to be restored, so I dont have to move out, so he doesnt file for divorce and that we eventually restore the communication that one day made us best friends.

In the name of Jesus,

Amen.

ps; I pray for all the troubled marriages, for all the wifes that suffer the abandonement of their husbands, for the pain that a human feels when you want to hug someone you love and you....just cant. Amen.

Comments From Readers ...

A reader says ... bless your hearts all of you...i'm going through the same thing. it is feb 17, 2005. i have 2 children and my husband has 2 children from previous marriges, he just recently told me he wants out he's not happy anymore, and we just moved into our dream home not but 2 months ago, so now i have to up root myself and my children to a small shoebox apartment, my son told me "mom i can't take another divorce", so now i feel like a failure as a mother having to put my children through this again, my first marriage was a mutal divorce, but my second marriage is one sided how do i go on being a happy go lucky mom but a dying wife that feels so incredibly devastated..i'm trying to keep a smile on my face but at night when it's time for bed my whole body weeps? i barely find the energy to make it out of bed in the morning. i had to quit school because i have to pick up more hours at work just to put food on the table! how do woman do it?
sicerely
jodi

A reader says ... I JUST READ YOUR LETTER DECEMBER 31,2004 I HOPE YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND MAKE AMENDS.MAY GOD BLESS YOU.

A reader says ... hello u all seem to have the same problem as i did in my marriage our husbands mother or brother that allowed them to be the way they are, if not running to them and living there but in there minds as well that when they r with u they r allowed to be the way they were at home and u shut up and put u  or else. i am 49 3 children 20 18 17 and none independant. i have worked my but of to give them the best and run a home and a business all they had to do was help me. ha well they didnt think they had to and the dad didnt either, so they didnt. i burnt myself out end end up in hospital life and death situation and my husband visited and the kids but he was still going to leave me and he did. i wonder why i got well but i did and i am still waiting for the reason for it. so u out there that think u want the man back, (and so do i) why do we? can anyone answer that question. i dont want to his mum i want to be me, and i want him to cherish me like he did his mum. x

A reader says ... Dear woman whose husband left on November 2, 2004.  I'll be praying for you and for your family and your husband.  Ask your husband what you could change to make him happy.  Ask him what it is about you that he doesn't like.  Decide that God does not want you to be critical of him.  For example his drinking.  God wants you to respect your husband.  Your husband needs your respect.  How can you respect him and think highly of him if you think he is an alchoholic.  Love covers a multitude of sins.  Some husband want to leave their wife because they get tired of being told they are wrong.  The Bible teaches that a wife should win her husband to God with her quiet and gentle spirit.  That does not include criticism.  Once at a marriage seminar someone asked Pastor Joe Wall who later was the President of Colorado Christian University - they asked him this question.  "When is it appropriate for a Christian wife to criticize her husband."  Joe answered and said, "The way I read the Bible a wife should never criticize her husband."  

If wifes lived by this rule, very few husbands would be getting divorced.

I know your situation may be different.  But ask your husband if he thinks you have been too critical of him over th past years of your marriage.  If he says "yes" then ask him for forgiveness and explain that you want to learn to be a Godly wife and not be critical of him.

God Bless - God can save your marriage!

A reader says ... My husband left me on November 2 after an argument about not spending enough time with me and drinking too much. He went on his hunting trip for 10 days and returned to tell me that he hasnt loved me in two to three years and that it wasnt in his heart to stay with me. He wasnt happy. Since that time he has told me that he hasnt loved me in the last 12 years and that he has only been with me because of our 12 yr old son. He is an alcoholic and wont admit to it. After the 10 days he was gone on his trip I was left wondering what was going to happen in our marriage. I have cried everyday since he left me on November 14, 2004. I have gone thru all of my kids birthdays and mine at the age of 45 now and I never saw it coming to this. I have asked God to come in to my life again and I have gone back to church and I talk to God all the time asking for his help to work on both of us so that we can get back together as a family. I love my husband very much and have forgiven him for everything that has happened in our marriage that was not good. I will continue to pray for him and my family. I trust in God to take control over this marriage and get us both on the right track, I don't believe God puts people together to take them apart. I will pray for all people in the nation and am thinking about all of the lonely families during the holidays. Just keep praying. In Gods time will we all heal.

A reader says ... My husband left me two   ago. today is 12-22-04, I know the pain your are feeling I never really did a lot of praying but I will pray for everyone who is going through the pain that I am going through, we also have three small children who don't understand what's going on, the worst part is we live in base housing because my husbands is in the military and will have to move in thirty days, i have no idea where to go, pray for me and i will pray for you.

A reader says ... What is it with the "Roberts"?  My husband's name is Robert, and he left me about 2 weeks ago.  Today is 12-21-04.  He stayed gone about 4 days, but he came back home and we are trying to work through this.  Sometimes, I feel like I'm trying harder than he is, but I'm trusting in GOD that he will take control of our marriage and lives.  I stand firm and believe that we are going to work this out and we will be a happy family once again.  We have a 3 year old daughter and he is a pastor.  I will pray for all you guys.  Please say a prayer for me!

A reader says ... I totally hear where your coming from. My husband left me 5 days ago. 14 days before christmas, one week after i found out we were expecting baby#3. There's nothing i want more than for him to come home. But he is at his mothers as well who is making it all to easy for him. My heart is broken and my house is no longer a home. Your last comment brought me to tears as i have wantd to hug and hold him so badly....but i can't.

A reader says ... my husband has left and he needs guidance. I will change but how long must i wait? Lord please let us work on this together not apart without outside influences. In Jesus's name I pray

A reader says ... Hi its November 1, 2004 and I really hope your husband is back home now. My husband who is also named Robert left me and our newborn about 6 months ago.  He is still not home and he is also at his mother's home. God has revealed to me that I need to change before my husband can come back home. The Lord is working in both of us but I guess we had to be separated to really grasp that the Lord is seeking our attention.  My husband has lost everything his job, car, etc.  I have faith he will come back but it won't be the same.  He left unsaved and I know that he has now commited his life to Christ so he'll be back a new man in Jesus Christ name. Keep your faith, the Lord is faithful to all his children.

A reader says ... I am praying for you.  My husband left me and our three children a month ago and says he hates me and will never come back.  He turned his back on God and then on us.  I feel like I am falling apart.  Dr. Dobson's book love must be tough has helped and of course God's word.  I am giving this to God as you should too.  God is all powerful and your husband and mine belong to Him.  Only God can reach these men.  I will pray for you, please pray for me.  My husbands name is Robert too.  

A reader says ... I am going through the same probem/issue.  All I know to do is pray that God would break our husbands and help them to find the Truth.  

A reader says ... I just read your letter.  It is Sept. 9, 2004.  I hope and pray you are happy.  Stacy