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Closure
My wife and I are divorcing. I need help trying to understand what it is she wants. I love her and I want our marriage to work. She says before she can come back she needs to close this chapter in her life before she can begin a new relationship rather it is me or someone else. While we were with the attorney yesterday she said she would be willing to attend counseling after we divorce. She stated she needed closure from our marriage. We have two kids who are currently living with me. All her mind is set on divorce and refuses to give us a second chance at rekindling our love for each other, I know the reward in the end will be greater than the risk but this seems to be all about her. I asked her about our 10 years of history and she said it meant nothing to her because there are no feelings there.
What can I do or say to her that may open her mind as well as her heart? I pray for it every night and I don't know that my prayers will ever be answered. I have also asked about our kids and she says they will be fine, even though she told me she is still affected by her parents divorce. She feels that the only difference is our kids are younger so they won't remember much. Our children want her back in their life, they ask for her every night in their prayers but she is refusing to listen. Our marriage had its good moments as well as bad ones like all marriages do. The sad part is when we fought there was a lot of verbal abuse in the relationship mostly by me. I have been going to counseling and I don't ever want to argue with my wife again. I want her to feel loved and appreciated. I am truly sorry for the mistakes I made.
She was unfaithful during our marriage and I am fathering a child that may not be mine, I have no issue with that because I know what my wife did was not intentional. I forgave her for everything. I have no reason to be in love with her but I am. I know deeply we are all going to suffer from this. All of our lives are never going to be the same. I know we will all be unhappy and there is a no win solution for anyone of us. Divorce is the worst thing that has ever crossed my path. It has been worse than losing a loved one. I want to know what can I do to make things right with my wife?
How can I get her to change her train of thought and be willing to give us a second chance? Is there something I can say or do? I know many people go through this and it is not easy. If anyone has any good advice please reply at m2hot_4u@hotmail.com. I welcome any prayers or suggestions from anyone. I am desperate, my kids need their mommy and if there was anything I could for them to have her back I would. I have tried to get her to attend a weekend retreat through church for troubles marriages but she has refused. She says she has accepted Jesus in her life, I ask how if this is truly what Jesus does not want? God hates divorce. I am looking for any kind of positive feedback that has worked for some people in the past. I need some answers.
Help
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