Should I Spank My Out of Control Children

I am a widow with two children. My son is 10 and my daughter is 8. I have never been a person who spanks my children; however, I receive discipline spankings from a man I am going to marry in preparation of our future household together and man and wife. My future husband has not been allowed to spank my children.  I don't feel it is his place.  My son is very mouthy and my daughter is very high-spirited.  I do believe that my son could use a good session with a belt against his backside and my daughter needs to be put in her place with a good over the knee bare bottom spanking from a strong male figure. My children are kind and loving, just somewhat out of sorts.  I honestly believe in my heart that they both need a strong, hard and long spanking to bring them around.  I am sure that they will also require reminder spankings as preventative medicine. How do I start now when I never have spanked them before?  Please let me know your thoughts?

Comments From Readers

A reader says ... Where in any scripture does it say that a woman should be physically disciplined by her boyfriend or husband?  What on earth are you thinking marrying someone who inflicts physical discipline on you - were you naughty??  This is completely insane.  I understand that from the writing style English may not be your first language but this type of behaviour is not biblical and is certainly not acceptable in western society.  If it's not too late RUN!  Maybe your children will behave better if they respect that you are a grown woman and their parental figurehead, not a little girl who is spanked - how can they respect that!!!???

A reader says ... If you have never spanked your children by this age, you have a difficult task ahead. A "mouthy" child and a "high-spirited child" need strong guidance. What you suggest, though is asking for problems ahead. Your future husband is not the one to administer punishment. It would only make acceptance of him more difficult. The scripture speaks of spanking a child "while there is hope." The meaning seems to be that the earlier spanking is started, the better (perhaps at about age one). It also says not to hold back the discipline because of the child's negative reaction. (See: Proverbs 19:18) You say they need a "strong, hard and long spanking to bring them around." This would likely be counter productive. Discipline should be administered at the time of the offense (unless in public, then take them to a private setting ASAP). The spanking should be without causing harm. Many believe that the fatty area on the buttocks is the best place - it is padded well. The spanking should not cause a bruise, only a sting that lasts long enough for the child to not want it again. Be warned, though, that many children will carry on as though they've been harmed in order to eliminate or minimize spankings in the future. To summarize: A spanking should: be immediate, appropriate, produce pain, but not cause lasting harm. For a good explanation of the steps of discipline, see: Ten Steps of Correction in the Parenting Tips section