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Im confused
Well my situation is very hard. I left my husband 8 months ago when I was not serving God. I left and started a relationship with another person while I am still married and in the divorce process. In the mean time this new person and I reconciled with God 5 months ago. Now I have knowledge of God. My husband does not know I am in this relationship. I am living with this new person in another state. I know I can't have sexual relations because I am serving God, which I haven't until recently. I ask God to forgive me and sanctify me. I do not want to do anything to jeopardize my relationship with God. Now the even harder part of this is Christmas. I have never had Christmas without my husband and my children. He took them for the holidays. He does not want to divorce.
He wants us to work it out. He is willing to do what ever it takes. I was the one who messed-ups and committed adultery even though he does not know this yet. I failed him as a wife and never agreed or backed him up in his career. I was too selfish. I wanted him home, I wanted to know what he was doing at all times I never gave him a chance to back him up in anything. I did not let him be his own person. I did not trust him because he was working to much and I thought he did not had time for me. Instead of backing him up and communicating with him I made him depressed and I left him. I did not serve the Lord then. All the things that I did to him I blamed it on him because he worked so hard. He is not Christian. He is a well-known person and a businessman. I know if he serves God he can be a powerful man in God. Now this new person has a lot of insecurities. He checks everything I do and where I go, who I talk to, checks my phone and more.
Everything I did to my husband whom I never found him doing anything wrong now this new person is doing it to me. He says he is seeking God but he is more worried of loosing me and what I am doing instead of trusting God and doing Gods will. I am confused. I love my husband but I am not in love with him. I want to do what is God's will but I don't know what to do because my husband is not Christian. I believe I need to break up this relationship with this new person even if it hurts. I want to be right with God but how do I know if my husband would come to the Lord or if the new man is the one for me. I'll keep praying. This is a big life decision.
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