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Im lost I need your help to find my life
Dr Phil,
I lost my Dad last Jan. I never knew he was my savior, the one who kept me in my family. I have lived next door for 30 yrs. I have done everything for them and now my sister has moved in with Mom and Mom wants nothing to do with me. I have 3 sisters and 3 brothers and they all help out mom but, when I ask to help she says its been taken care of.
This is hard because I was the one who took care of things before. I was the one she called when she needed help. My sister had a baby and she went to her baby shower and stayed with her for over a month to help with the baby (Mom looked great.)
Then when my son was getting married Mom didn't come to the shower nor for the wedding. I asked if I could take her to buy her a new dress and she said no she didn't think she would go to the wedding (and if she did she would wear her outfit that she wore to the funeral.) I was crushed; I asked her, "Why? What have I done?"
She said, "Nothing", and laughed.
I said I was hurt and I didn’t think it was funny. I asked again what I have done to be treated like this but she just said,” No, no, no" and then she said, "I’m going to go". I tried to talk but she hung up the phone.
I am so hurt. My Sister whom is living with Mom had an affair with my husband and tried to break up my marriage. She told Mom that my husband raped her. That was thirty plus years ago. I thought it was in the past, but its like she wants to take Mom away from me and its working.
I have tried to visit with my mom and my sis will walk by and bump into me or grab a comb and start combing her hair like she's an invalid. My other family says don't cause trouble; just let it go. Mom is all I have left, too. Isn’t there some way that I can be a part of my mom's life?
I feel like I'm 12 again. I hurt all the time. I see my sis driving my dad's car. I called my brother and asked him to please talk to her and tell her to stay away from me. She likes to drive through my yard and look in my windows. She said she couldn't find her dog and I said,” I won't let your dog in my house", so just stay away from me. But she still does it. If I need a restraining order I will get one, but I know they will say I'm at fault.
I have two other sisters. The one who had the baby isn't talking to me and when I ask why she says nothing is wrong. She did come to my son's wedding and my other older sister. She always told me not to trust that one (the one who is with mom), but now, for some reason, she has hired her to work in her store. I have offered to help with the store also, but she never wants my help. I don't know what I can do. I know something is being said about me or my family that isn't true, but I can't get anyone to tell me what it is.
We built our home next door to Mom and Dad 3o years ago and never had any trouble. Now my sister moved back to Minn. and I'm out. I call Mom and ask her if she wants to go to church or to the luncheon they have on Thursdays and she says, "No, no, I don't want to go any place."
She does go shopping with others and visiting. Please help me. I have cried everyday since my Dad died and I feel like I have lost my Mom too. She was never like this. The ladies at church say they are praying for Mom and I thank them. I have asked them to call her and invite her to go to church (she loved to go to church). They tell me to hang in there, but it hurts so bad I will do anything. I don't have to be the one who is right.
I have friends who love me and I know that, but I need my mom. Please tell me what do I do? How do I fight a lie? How long will it take for mom and my sisters and brothers to realize who the real liar is ?????????????
Mom wound up in the hospital because she stopped taking her pills because my sis stopped taking her pills. Would you want this person living with your mom?
Editor:
Dear Site visitor,
I certainly feel for you. We are not Dr. Phil but it sure would be great if Dr. Phil did contact your mom and try and help you two reconcile. If you want to email us your contact information to mail@marriageromance.com and we will try and forward your request to Dr. Phil. We will be praying for you as you continue to show your mother and sister God's unconditional love.
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