Title: "lunatic without sleep" Author: Unknown
Its almost 2 am way past bedtime but my eyes
Wide open. So many things coming in my mind
Like it going to explode. Why everyone is
Sleeping when I can't... may be its time to get
My coffee. Is there anything open my beloved?
Tim Hortons may be on Laurier Street.
Its raining a mellow stream of cold water .Do I
Need an umbrella but rain doesnt bother me
Much.is it freezing out here maybe -10 atleast
Feels like it. So many poems so many thoughts
Ready to come out of my heart or soul but am
Tired writing them. Do you know someone who
Is tired of sleeping - I am. I can't sleep anymore
This is my 6th night but.lets get back to my
First night.yes where were we I was walking on
Elgin Street to get coffee for my sleepless night
And contemplating why I need to sleep or do
What? Is it because of the job I am doing that I
Dont want to. Or is it the life I am leading that
I am tired of. Is it really me that I am writing?
About or my friend from Latvia Scare-Coeur who
Is in pain. He can't think those love letters that I
Use to write or those memories that
Common man use to print. Do you know he
Stopped playing violin because music was
Talking to him and when one starts
Understanding the words they dont make sense
Anymore. How good a tragic romance novel be
If there is no tragedy in it. I pass thru the
Church, so calm so peaceful as if calling in
Voiceless noise to come my beloved and be with
Me. I smile and move on, as I know "If I go they
Wont be there".
Do you know Insomnia has totally different?
Perception about time about everything in your
Life when you get use to it. Like immortality
Because you know the thing that never comes is
A thing no to be afraid of.
My Heart aches sometimes but when I feel sad I
Write happy words and joyous verses to counter
My darker thoughts. Thats why the best man in
Ones marriage should be a clown-if you know
What I mean.
AM I making any sense to you? May be not but
Hey thats my space and I am writing after the
Week of sleepless dream less vibes I have -to
Give you some inner thoughts of being me :)
Laurier Street - Tim Hortons no one is there
Except some cop cars as thats there hangout
And some zombies like me. If you ever end up in
Ottawa: dont forget to got Tim Hortons on
Laurier-Metcalf corner they have the best coffee.
It keeps me going. Xmas is coming by so
Everyone still is talking about shopping.gifts
And trees. Trees that we bring home and do all
Thus things and then forget all about them. Like
The mellow hearts we feel to go and donate food
These days and dont even think about the street
People whole year.maybe they eat only on
Christmas? There is not much escape for street
People in winter in Ottawa as there are no big
Malls or subway vents that can warm them
When they sleep. There are only cold freezing
Nights and open space.
"Is there anything I could do for you"? A warm
Smile and touching words from a stranger as
She saw me staring out of glass into nowhere. I
Smile and thank for her concern. Self-conscious
That maybe she noticed my unseen tears or the
Lava boiling in my upper chambers. Do I have to
Read something to fake that I am a normal
Being. I should be able to stare the street in
Darkness. She is gone ...and I am back to my
Train of thoughts. Its 4 am time passes by.
Almost time to wakeup and do my early
Morning rituals. Have you noticed if you dont let
You programmed TV to shutdown at 12 am it
Wont wakeup at 5 am? I know you will say duh
Because it never powered down so if its true
Then why if I havent been sleeping I have to do
Morning rituals?
Well because my day never starts without my
Morning coffee, work out, shave.warm
Bath and music. I am ok with insomnia but I
Have to start a new day...
Sleep is like a drug or alcohol you feel good.do
You? I think you don't feel anything that's why
Its good for you.it takes you away from the
World to the other planet where you can do lot
Of things imagine lot of Worlds that you couldn't
In the daytime. But what good a sleep when
Bedside reminds you of something gone.
Something wrong.
So that's my first night of insomnia you have to
Wait for the other nights. So that you be ready
When insomnia hits you...